Loneliness

I am alone most of the time.  My husband died about 4 1/2 years ago.  Theoretically I am okay with being alone.  I am a strong, independent woman.  I don't need a man in my life to make me complete.

However...

I miss the shared times.  Someone to talk with.  Someone to do things with. Someone who is there and cares what is going on in my life.  Someone that I care what is going on in their live.

So, now my struggle is how do I meet someone?  Do I want to meet someone?  Do I try an online dating service?  Do I go to the singles class at my church? (That is how I met my husband 30 years ago.)

I just don't know and it has left me feeling very lost and very alone.  Most of the time I am okay, but right now I am lonely.

You've got to start somewhere

I started writing a blog on the Weight Watchers website.  I was doing quite well at keeping up with it.  However when I started leading meetings myself I felt uncomfortable writing where my members could see.  After all, I was writing to keep me accountable to myself.  I wanted the freedom to write whatever and I felt restricted.  Anyway, I am going to try to write here and see how it goes.

Tomorrow is weigh-in day for me.  I have to weigh-in because, as a leader, I have to weigh-in every month. I am not worried about being in the healthy range, but I may not be where I want to be.  This has really been an up and down week for me.  It was very hard to have a Fourth of July on my own.  That follows Father's Day on my own.  I guess the on my own thing will be the topic of a blog another day.

The other exciting event tomorrow will be the end of the evaluation period of my ActiveLink device from Weight Watchers.  I don't think I have been as active this week as usual, but it will be interesting to see what it comes up with and what it sets for my 12 week goal.

Anyway, I have started to write again.  I think it really helped me to sort things out when I was blogging before.